These Ways

These ways,
These things going on in my life,
My mind,
Going crazy,
Trying to discern Your Will from mine.

My mind,
Lost in worldly vices,
Worldly thought,
Must be cause I feel myself far from You.

Your Will,
You Way,
Is what I want,
Is what I seek,
Or at least that’s what I say.

Memories of the past, the last times I let You down, times I played around but also remembering those times I stuck around, my feet firm on the ground.

At those times, in those ways I was not moved, could not be moved for You held me firm, it was You who gave me strength.

These way,
These days I feel myself being broken,
My Will falling down,
You Will coming up,
Rising above as I seek You,
As I begin to see You, see myself.

A ministry I thought was true now vaguely seems Your Will, a girl, a young lady of God I thought to date, saying she didn’t feel the same, when I thought it was You. Perhaps it was, perhaps it all was a lesson, something to learn, something to teach.

These ways forcing me to be less of me,
And more of You.
To know my God,
That it’s not about my wants,
Or what I feel I need,
But what You tell me I need,
What You tell me to do.

To rip my Will from Yours and throw it away.
To give up self,
All of me,
Everything for One,
The Son, who bled,
Who took on sin for me.

That is these ways, each and every day, not my Will, but They Will be done. That You would break me and build me up stronger after this, that I would shine, be a light of Your goodness, Your Holiness. That others would see You in me, flowing through me. Not so that I may gain fame, or acclaim, but that Your glory would be shown, and known. That Your ways would truly be on earth as it is in heaven, so that they may know you, the One True God, the only One who can help humanity from itself, who can fill the void that exists, who can give us life better than this.

If we will only admit,
Commit,
Only understand, reach out our hands,
Trust in You,
The Lord,
The One and Only God,
Who holds,
Who is and will be the Truth!

-By: Daniel Brockhan

These Thoughts

Wondering what could have been,
What might have been,
Yet I stop myself,
Knowing it will never be,
If she does not like me.

Wondering if something is,
Or was wrong with me,
If it was me or she,
Wondering why I never got a chance,
Wondering while I remain alone, 
While others get the chance.

I took the chance of asking,
And found things changed.
How things used to be they are no more,
The door that seemed open,
Now shut forevermore.

These thoughts flow through my brain,
Questions come and go,
Day by day.

Having trouble getting her out of my mind,
Yet trying to maintain a friendship that is divine.
A friendship of a sister in Christ,
That’s so important to me,
But a hurt,
An aching from the thought of what will never be.

I took a step on the limb,
I prayed to You,
Trying to seek Your face God,
So why,
I ask why did it turn out this way?
Was it my plan and my will and never Yours,
Or somehow was it messed up,
By something of this world?

The thoughts of what could have been and never will be…
And I wonder is there God,
Anyone out there for me?

Will there ever be a girl to fill my heart,
Because sometimes I wonder,
If I will ever be liked at all. 

To hear I possess all the quality a young lady requests,
But then none give a second thought when pressed.

Will there ever be a girl who sees my heart,
Who sees a love for You Lord,
A passion that won’t die?

Before I never wondered,
Before I didn’t care,
But I wonder if there is someone for me out there!

Is there one woman who will see my heart,
Who will see me for who I am and feel for me as I feel for her?

I cry out to You because I know your there,
Lord,
I just don’t want to be alone down here.
I love You so much and I want a person to share,
All the wonderful times,
And stories of You.
And Your Glory.

Is there someone for me,
If so who,
Cause right now I feel alone…

But I know You will get me through!

-By: Daniel Brockhan

My One And Only

My One and Only I have not made You,
My self I try to push away, I struggle to put to death.

What is Your will?
What is mine?

How do I know if I am doing Your Will,
When I know my eyes are blinded by my flesh.

I yearn to know You more,
To be Your vessel,
To let you speak through me,
But I know for that to be that I must let go,
I must lay myself down,
I must break down myself,
My wants,
My desires,
All the things I long for,
All the things I long to be are nothing without You.

I could have a high paying job,
The most beautiful girl,
The most popular friends,
I could gain the respect of millions,
I could gain all the laughter,
All the fun,
Yet without You it is nothing,
Life is empty.

As much as I struggle and hurt,
To do Your Will,
I know I cannot return,
I cannot deny who You are and who I am.

My place is under You,
Under Your direction.

You long for me to be a godly man,
A holy man,
Yet not for my glory but for Yours.

For as much as I long for the things of life,
I stop myself because they are my ideas,
they are my plans.

I am tired of doing things my way,
My way never helps me,
You know that,
But Your way never fails me.

Whether Your way causes me blessings,
Or a struggle,
It is far better than my own…

-By: Daniel Brockhan

Scribbles of Faith

Fall 02 – Scribbles of Faith in History Class

I can’t stop thinking about You and Your goodness.
I try to concentrate but find my mind is consumed by You.
I try to think of my studies but thoughts of You consume my mind.
I just want to soak You up.
Lord give me the urge to let You out.

Let me take all this inside of me,
This consuming desire to be shown in my life,
Let me speak Your name.

Help me Lord for I yearn to gain knowledge but only to use it through Your Spirit.
I desire more and more of You.
I desire others to have more and more of you.
I want others to understand.
I want others to see, to feel you as I do.
I want others to understand how sweet you truly are.

That the things here are temporary,
But that you alone are forever,
That You alone are never changing.

I want others to have a true intimate relationship with You.
Give me the strength to stand up when I am called.
Give me the strength to be bold when Your Spirit moves me.

The world almost seems a haze,
It seems that so many seek to have a comfortable God,
A God that is thee but no true relationship exits.

If they only knew.
If could only get a glimpse,
Of what it is to be close to You.

If it could be…
Oh, I wonder what could happen.

-By: Daniel Brockhan

Consume Me Lord

Consume me Lord,
Break my life,
Break my heart for those who do not know You,
For those who live in darkness,
That I have not shown the light too,
Those whose only hope in life is death,
Whose only Joy is in the very sins that bring depression. 
Break me God to show them Lord,
Break me till I am humbly on my knees Lord.
Break me so that I am an empty vessel for you to use. 

I yearn to show others Your goodness Lord.
Help me to show them,
Help me to be a voice out of many for You Lord.
Give me the power through Your Spirit to let go,
To step out on faith,
To lean not on my own understanding,
But to stand firmly on You,
To stand by Your side. 
To realize that You are so awesome,
And that You are there,
You are here for me,
That You are with me.
Help me to remember You are with me,
Because I so soon forget,
I so soon get distracted Lord. 

God help me as I struggle.
Help my struggle not be against 
You but for You,
Help me to let it go,
In addition, follow Your Will,
And Your Way. 
Help me to let Your Holy Spirit fill me to the brim.

Help me to be full of You and not of this World.
For while I yearn to be in Your presence,
Part of me it seems yearns to be in myself,
To live for myself. 

And that is just the problem. 
The problem of all the little things we do,
That do not bring Glory to You,

The time we waste,
The time we throw away to worthless idols,
To worthless things,
Which have nothing to do with You. 
We spend so much time doing things,
That do not bring You glory,
And the other part of our life we learn about Your Glory,
About Your majesty,
We hear about how we are to live for You,
We see in Scripture how people were sold out to You,
And yet we are not! 

Why does it not break us? 

Why does it not move us to know,
That we are doing the very things,
Which are contrary to Your Will, 
The very things,
Which You want us to do,
We do halfway,
We stand in a comfortable position,
We stand where we think we are good,
Where people can assume we are Christians,
And yet no true fruit,
No real outpouring of the Holy Spirit is shown,
Nor does it seem to be felt. 

Why is this? 
Why do we hold back? 

Why do we linger in the shadows,
Or in that place of light and dark,
With one foot in the TRUTH,
And one foot out of the TRUTH. 
God consume us,
Slap us with Your Spirit. 
Let Your Spirit burst forth through me,
Let it burst through us all.

Change us Lord,
Transform us in to an image of You.
Lord may we let it ALL go,
May we lay ourselves before Your feet,

May we not just act as if You are inside,
But let it be real in our life.
Let it be for us all Lord.
Consume our hearts,
Consume our minds,
Consume our souls,
Our very inner being.

God I crave You.
And I know in my heart,
That there are others who crave You. 
We long to be fully indwelt,
To be fully open to You,
To not see our plans,
To not see our future,
To not see our opinions,
Or ideas but to sacrifice them,
To give them up for you,
To lay them at Your feet,
To die for self so that we will find a new,
A sweeter self in You,
That we would be transformed through You,
So, 
Those others will be transformed as well!
That Your Spirit would move Lord,
That we would feel it,
That it would be our guide,
And counselor,
That our hearts,
Ears,
And eyes would be open to You.
Help us Lord for we are far from You,
We are far from Your presence.
So many of us are blind to our sins,
To the sinful disobedient life we live.

Lord break us all,
Knock us out with Your Spirit God,
This is what we need,
This is how it should be Lord.
Not that we are holier or righteous than another,
But that You are Holier,
And Righteous,

That the full extent of every good,
And perfect gift does truly come from You,
That Your Spirit,
That a close,
Intimate,
And personal relationship with You brings out these qualities,
Not only in our self,
But also in those who we tough through Your Spirit.

When will we let go?
When will we stand up?

When will we decide that we don’t have to live this way,
That we no longer have to live trapped,
We don’t have to live in a box because Your Son has set us free,
With his blood our sins are cleansed,
Through his death we are healed.
We no longer have to be chained down by this world because we are free,
We don’t belong here accept for a short time,
Our home isn’t here,
Our home is in heaven,
With God as our Light,
And Jesus as our Lamp.
We are free but we trap ourselves inside of self,
But when God moves his Spirit burst through self,
It flows through and shows Gods awesome presence,
Through something that is not awesome. 
Everything must,
And needs to be laid down,
Our lives must change,
Must be transformed,
Or the Spirit will never be let loose.
We must lay it all down,
And be led by the Spirit or God will never move as He could.
If we do not stand up,
How many people might miss,
A glimpse of God’s Spirit,
But if we stand,
If we speak,
Shout of Jesus,
Then,
And only then will God’s Spirit break forth,
And move!

-By: Daniel Brockhan

These Three Things: Part Two

Three things I have prayed for,
And three things God has now given me a peace about.
Now that I am getting over these three I see two more,
But perhaps there are hundreds,
Even thousands more.
Perhaps there are so many beyond I can’t even see them yet. 
Yes,
There are thousands,
Perhaps millions of things,
Which I will pray God will help me through.

He will guide me through them,
I will make it through or over each hurdle,
I will persevere to get the prize,
Yet I do not do this for myself,
Through the self which God took and made self-less,
Whom He gave new life,
He gave new hope,
That He gave himself to be in an intimate relationship with.

So many things to happen down the road,
Down the path,
Through this race of life…
Many of these things we have no glimpse of,
These we need not to worry about,
But to lay our future at the feet of Him,
Who already controls not only our present but our future.
We lay it down before God,
Because we know in our hearts,
That life is so much sweeter under,
And in the hands of God,
Who is Ultimate Love,
Ultimate Peace,
And Ultimate Hope.

It is only through God will our life be joyful,
Only when we lay our lives,
Our choices,
Our desires,
And wants before Him,
Are we complete through Him,
And His Son,
Jesus Christ?

Only then,
In that humble place,
Will we break through our self,
Let the Holy Spirit take control,
And the Joy of Christ,
Which we have hidden for so long inside,
Will burst forth. 

Only then,
In that place will brokenness,
Will a revival of self,
Our City,
Our State,
Our Country,
And World begin to happen. 

If we would just lay them down,
If we would only lay every aspect of our life,
And thoughts before God then,
And only then will God truly be out God,
Then we will see the hand of God,
As never before in not only our own life,
But see Gods touch on those around us. 

If all is given then all is taken care of,
Who better to take care of every aspect?
And detail of our life,
Then the very one who gave us our life during the beginning. 
Who better than God?
Who better than our Creator?
Who better than the Bringer of ALL Life,
And the Savior of souls?
Who?
I ask Who?

-By: Daniel Brockhan

These Three Things: Part One

I feel as if I am in the midst of a battle,
A spiritual battle within myself.
I have come up to three walls,
Three things which God has laid on my heart to do,
To pray about and begin.
These three things I have prayed about,
And have earnestly sought God’s Will in all of them.
God has convicted me of all three,
And is teaching me to be bold,
Not to cower,
But to strive on,
To persevere through the distractions,
In this world that block me,
Even my own flesh,
My own self,
My fear,
Me doubt,
The questions that come up inside of me.
I know that I can only go through,
And do these three things by relying of God,
And nobody else.

I know my home is not this world,
And yet still these three things seem to block my way.

All have to do with my inner man,
All have to do with the old verses new,
The Flesh verses the Spirit.
For God is pounding on my heart to do His Will,
I know precisely what to do,
But my service is diffused or vanishes as soon as life,
As soon as distractions come along.

Why do I not let it all go?
Why do I even care what others think because,
God alone,
You alone matter.
I want,
Need,
And long to let it all go.
I see how far I have come,
And yet I cannot ignore,
These three things before me. 

I cannot see what is on the other side,
And know that I will only find out,
After I conquer these with You help alone. 

My soul grieves for why I keep You in a Box….
For You have placed these three things before me,
I know through the Spirit,
That You alone matter more than anything else. 

I know that if You have placed these before me,
That I needed to follow through,
That I need to keep my mind on You.
That I will speak when speak is needed,
That I am silent when silence is needed. 
That I would seek You,
And seek to follow Your will in All,
In one-hundred percent of my life,
That I would live in Your presence,
Through Your Holy Spirit. 

I pray that I will follow You,
That I would lay these three things down before Your feet…
That I would let so and not care about pleasing another buy You. 
For You alone are King,
You alone are God,
If I do anything,
That does not glorify You,
Then I loose the whole purpose for my life.
Help me,
Help us ALL!

-By: Daniel Brockhan

Your Presence

I feel Your presence,
Not just through a song,
Not just through a preacher.

Not just through upbeat,
Or slow music.
Not just through a bold,
Or funny preacher.

It’s becoming difficult now,
As if I dwindle and carve my life for You,
I feel Your presence,
Through the joy of others,
Through the sorrows of others.

I feel Your presence,
When I am awake,
I feel it as I sit in silence,
I feel it as I sit in a crowd.

You are beginning to consume,
All my thoughts,
I lay myself down because,
You are all I need,
Because,
You are all that anyone truly needs.

Sure we have wants of the body,
Of our flesh,
We have needs of our physical body,
But the need for God,
The need to be His child,
To be transformed from old to new,
From flesh to Spirit,
This is the need more important than all others!

I feel an urge to continually serve you,
To not stay,
To not wait as time passes by,
As souls are being taken from this earth,
Many of whom don’t know You,
Have rejected You,
Have denied Your existence.

If they only felt the what I have felt,
Your presence is so clear,
So loud,
So expressed through all creation.

If we would only seek You more,
If we would leave our sins,
Our flesh,
Our desires,
Our wants,
Truly turn to You for everything,
To serve You with all we are,
To make our life’s truly a living sacrifice.

If we would just be obsessed with You,
Overwhelmed by You,
Who You are,
What You have done,
Are doing,
And will do,
What a change would happen.

If we all would feel Your presence,
Every second of our life,
Through school,
Through work,
Through play,
Through worship,
Through fellowship.

If our life was consumed by Your Name,
So vast that all would know it was Your work,
For Your names,
Or,
That we would be a generation unlike any other,
That we would be filled with Your Spirit,
That we would live in Your presence daily,
That a pouring out of Your Spirit,
A revival of hearts would take place,
So that right now,
We would be Your people,
And You would be our God.

That we would lay down all idols before You,
That we would lay down our lives,
Our friendships,
Our relationships,
Down before Your throne,
Before Your very feet.

Oh,
That we all would say,
“Your Will be done God.”

Your Will be done,
Because we are saved,
We have been set free by Your Son,
Jesus Christ,
Because of Him we can hear You,
See You,
One day even though You,
When we finally meet You in Heaven,
When our bodies will be glorified,
Transformed from perishable to imperishable.

Praise Be To God,
For Your Glory May We Change Our Ways!


-By: Daniel Brockhan

My Soul Yearns

My soul yearns,
For more of you,
The goodness that You bring to my life,
No other can bring,
Or could ever bring.

The things of this earth,
Disappear,
As my love for You strengthens,
The things of this earth,
Seem dull,
When compared to the glory of your presence.

I am forced to be here,
No,
Gifted to be here,
To share Your Name,
To bring You glory.

As I am in this place,
This world,
Which I no longer feel apart of.

I want Your touch,
I need Your touch.

No other gives the Love You give,
No other gives the Life You give,
No other saves the way You save,
You did it for me,
For all humanity,

I yearn for more of You,
The one who loved us so much,
That Christ would take on all those sins,
That Christ would die on the cross.

I yearn for a touch from You,
The One who gave me a way,
A way I couldn’t pave on my own.

A way that gave hope,
When no hope was found,

A way that gave peace and joy,
While Christ took out sin and shame.

I yearn for more of You,
My God,
My Creator,
My Savior,
And my Lord!

-By: Daniel Brockhan

Waking Up

I had a dream of me living my life,
I tried to serve Christ,
But found others did not wish too.

Other wished to live for the moment,
To live for themselves.

People wanted to cheat,
To save money.

People wanted to lie,
To gain favor.

People wanted to follow their own way,
Instead of the Lord's.

These people were my best friends,
And my acquaintances.
Though Christians,
Many of them chose to serve themselves.

In the course of their sin,
They brought me down.
They ridiculed me for my higher values and ways.
They claimed that what they did wasn't wrong.
I tried to explain,
But they would not listen at all,
They were too busy living for themselves,
Than to try to live for Christ.

At first this made me frustrated,
Because I didn’t understand why.
Then I got angry and began to yell,
Because no one would listen,
No one understood.

Then at last,
Through everything I began to weep.

I began to week for those who know Christ,
But do not follow Him,
They choose to live a life of sinner,
When the Holy Spirit lies within them.
They choose the world over the goodness that God has.

I also wept for those who do not know Christ.
These people who live their own way,
They make up their own morals.
Some are so far from God,
While some can almost touch Him.
How can these sinners be told the good news,
By Christians who do not know,
Do not experience the good news in their lives.

I finally wept for those who follow Christ
And suffer ridicule for his sake.

Weeping for all of this only took a few seconds,
Then I woke up,
Mentally and emotionally drained,
Feeling like I had wept for more than a few seconds,
Yet there were no tears,
Nothing was wet

As I thought about this,
I though about this question:

Why are there no tears?

~ Daniel Brockhan

04/25/02

You called me here,
I followed Your voice,
I have a desire to know you
But I get caught up in this life,
I have a desire to sacrifice all to You,
But I see the,
So called,
Glorious things of the earth and go away.

I know that only You will satisfy all my needs and wants,
So why do I want other things?
Why do I feel that I need other things,
Other people?
Why do I care how people see me?
Why do I separate myself?
Why am I scared to speak out?

I am afraid Lord,
I am so afraid to let You have control, and yet,
I know that it is the only way to find satisfaction.
For in my sacrifice,
In my obedience,
In my weakness,
You are made strong.

Father,
What aspects of my life have I not given over to You?
What aspects do you wish for me to change,
God I am so scared to be an open vessel!
I know that You will be with me but I am still scared.

I feel like a child in a black room,
When I should feel like,
A child surrounded by Light!

I know that You love me,
I know that You are by me.
I don’t understand it?
I don’t know why I feel this way?

Why I don’t speak out?
Why I am not bold?

Help me God to shed it all down,
To shed it all down,
To be broken,
To be transparent,
To speak out for You,
To openly give glory to You as I know I should!

Help me not to feel hindered,
But to worship You through my life,
To worship You all the rest of my life.
Help me to continually seek Your face.
Help me to be bold and proclaim Your name.

I want to glorify Your name in all that I do,
And lead others to that conviction.
I know the things of this world do not satisfy,
They are not as sweet,
Majestic,
Or Glorious as You.

For You,
O God,
Are the Creator.

You are the one who sent Christ,
To save us from our sins.
You not only gave Your Son,
But you gave a part of Yourself.

The least I can do is give myself.
If an Infinite and Holy God,
Will give up any part of Himself for me,
Because He loves me,
The least,
The best thing I can do is give my life to Him.

God,
I give You my life,
I already asked You to be my Lord,
But I never let all my walls down.
You knew this day would come,

It is only through Your strength that I will make it,
It is only through You that I am anything at all.
Only through You,
God,
Your Son,
Jesus Christ,
And Your Holy Spirit.

May my mind begin to always be fixed on these things,
On the trinity,
On the God that keeps,
Not only me,
But all humanity alive with His Will,
And gave us a way to be with Him,
Through His Will.

Your Servant,
Daniel Brockhan