Sobbing Christian

His hands covered his sobbing-wet face. His cries echoed in his apartment and inside the very foundations of his soul. He threw his devotional book across the room, crying out to God. Why did things have to be so hard? Why did they have to be so difficult? He was always taught the answers were found in the scriptures but no one told him life, real life, would be so hard, so confusing. He desired simply to follow his dreams, to use his talents, to be the person he believed he was called to be... yet there was this void, this empty space now; the time between that calling and that reality. It was here where he must face the fact that nothing comes easy, including following the Creator.

As his sobs began to subside he looked and saw the book and pen on the floor, the light from the bathroom shining on both of them. The pages were shuffled and worn, they were scattered and folded. It was not neat. Silence filled the room, so much silence. Silence makes us always face our self. Silence makes us listen to God. Silence forces us into the places we would rather not be...

With the coldness from his tears still fresh on his face, he wiped away the wetness, picked up the pen and the book. The crying, the anger... it all changes nothing… but sometimes helps. It helps us move forward but also helps us in small bits to understand that we are not in control. God is in control. We are confused about a great many things but God is not confused. What we lack is the sight of God, yet if we had the answers... Well, where would be the searching? Where would be faith and trust? Where would be the journey if we went from the starting line directly to the finish? How would we ever help others if we never met with God to learn how to help them and grow ourselves?

He had hope, not in his present situation, but he had hope in the future situation, the one where God will wipe away his last tear, along with all others. He found hope in knowing that one day all his confusion would be wiped clean and clarity would ensue. He had hope that Christ had a good future for him, getting there was not going to be easy, but it was going to be worth it.. And in all things, bad times or good, Christ still be glorified.

~ Daniel

Pic:
http://cache2.asset-cache.net/xc/tlp707315.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=B5384F3B2A5A9842ABA04DA218E58E0623F6FAC9D53C620F2C578505D7FCD82BF06BF04B24B4128C

Beauty of God

Today I saw and experienced the Beauty of God. The lights were down low, then the guitar started, the voices began to break forth, and the drums began to beat... In this place, here amongst the people of God I see splendor.

Here I see the glory of God. I see his face and sometimes in my sin I feel ashamed, I feel unworthy, I feel I must drop my head down, my eyes facing toward the ground. Then the music extends, it breathes, it finds its place in me, and in this time I find my voice… I ponder the loving God who loves me despite my faults. Here I raise my head, I dance a little inside, I open my eyes to see the purple-pink colors hushed by the surrounding darkness.

Here I see the face of those voices, of that guitar, the keyboard player, and the drummer whose beats seem to beat evenly with my own heart. I look and see some singing out and some standing silent, some praying and some with hands lifted. In the company of his worshipers I see God, I am aware... I didn’t feel this for a long time; spiritually I didn’t feel anything for a long time. And here, in this body, in this church I feel my family; I feel and see.... the Beauty of God.



~ Daniel

Pic:
http://www.fbcvalley.org/Portals/0/worship_screen%5B1%5D.jpg

Happy Valentines

Happy Valentines

Happy Valentines
Happy Valentines
The Day of all days
The Day love is supposed to shout
The Day couples adore
The Day that singles try to ignore

The day that brings smiles to those in love
The day that brings disdain to those left out

A day of great rejoicing
And also a day of great sorrow

Facebook status updates from couples,
Couples happily celebrating their time of love
And from singles trying to go about their day,
Who try to stay inside and out of the way.

Sadly, sometimes both sides miss the point…
This day is not about having to spend money on the one you love
Neither is it about being sorrowful and trying to ignore the existence of love

Love is not found in the pocketbooks of your significant other
Nor is it found by pretending it doesn’t exist

Love is not found out of how much money you can spend
Nor how well you can hide inside yourself

Love is found in the faces of family
Love is found in the faces of your friends
Love is found by those who bless you,
And by those you allow yourself to bless as well

Love is found in kind words
In deeds that express appreciation

Love is found in the day to day
Not just on the 14th of February

Love is found in loving gestures when unexpected
Love is found in encouraging others who are down
Love is found alongside faith and hope
Love does not disappoint
Love does not cause Unhappiness
Nor Weariness
But Longing
And Joy!

Love is found with good friends
Love is found in those who make us laugh
Love is found in a warm cup of chocolate or coffee on a cold day
Love is found in those who care and are concerned for you life and well-being
Love is found when a stranger gives to the needy person on the street

Love does not boast
Love does not forget
Love remembers
Love cherishes

Where there is no love
There is hate
Where there is no love
There is no joy
Where there is no love
There is no meaning
Where there is no love
There is simply no life…

So on this day
Remember love
Remember those you love
And those who love you

Remember you are loved
And loved by others

Remember,
Be loved
And Love,
My friends….

~ Daniel

Pic:
http://www.smashingapps.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/love-wallpaper.jpg
http://hayleybailey.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/love11.jpg

Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. – Proverbs 3:3

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing…. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. – 1st Corinthians 13:1-3, 13

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us…. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. – 1st John 3:16, 4:9-10

Green Light

Green Light

He remained so close
Yet so far away

The light he saw
The one he saw every night across the way

The distance between here and there
The light of love
The awareness of change
The need perhaps for risk
All these span the distance
The distance it would take to get there

The Green Light
The one that would see into his soul
The Green Light
Mysterious and unique
Yet constant and piercing at the same time

Some days it gave him hope of something new
Something to look forward to

Other days it taunted and haunted him
As he relived his past in his mind
And could barely see a future different from those memories

He had high hopes but was realistic
He had passion but desired friendship
He wanted to be connected to another
Yet retain his unique self at the same time

Still that light across the way shinned every night
As its greenish hue shimmered in the lake between
Hope and Courage
Fear and Doubt
They all collide in this place

~ Daniel

Pic:
http://www.hiddenmeanings.com/GreenLight.JPG